To Do Lists

I have a tumblr now (http://urkinduhsexy.tumblr.com) but I think I will keep this site to keep me on track with to-do's and such. Feel free to unfollow if it gets to boring for you :)

For today:
Math:
[X] go over R4, R5, R6
[X] do homework

Anthro of Music Migration:
[x] listen to music examples

PH Theory:
[/] read chapter 1&2

PH Nutrition:
[ ] email group members?
[ ] read chapter 2 & 3 for book 1
[ ] read articles 5-8 book 2

Goals for this week:
- Go to the ARC at least ONCE (Baby steps, riight?)
- Organize HOAG Gyn/Uro stuff into binder
- Reduce time on computer for non-school related stuff
- KEEP FOCUSED

Goals

If there was one thing I learned in 11th grade English, it has to be that reminding yourself of your goals daily helps motivate you to do well. Mrs. McVay, my English teacher, made us write down 3 goals, each day as a reminder of what we have to accomplish. I'm going to start doing that each day from now on.

Some of my goals are:

+ Looking on the bright side. I mean, sure a smile is a sign of optimism, but what's a smile without the joy behind it? I feel as if I constantly concentrate on the past, instead of smile about the future. THIS WILL CHANGE.
+ Except no excuses. Whether it's about school, work, exercising...I keep making excuses for myself in attempts to rid myself of shame. Tsk.
+ Say thank you more, especially to my parents.
+ & finally...just make it happen.

HawthoRNe

Doesn't fail to excited me to eventually become a nurse, one day. I really cannot wait to look forward to being on my feet for 12 hour shifts, doing something every single minute of my time there, and knowing that I damn well deserve my sleep. I know my path may be different than the traditional, but everyday I keep thinking that despite all the unexpected twists and turns with school and all, that I will be an RN one day.

Night

My favorite time of the day is after 10pm, sitting in my room, listening to good music, and just thinking...

Wonderful Tonight - Eric Clapton

Guilty

Okay, I ADMIT it...I'm more than slightly intrigued with Filipino Soapoperas...aka "teleseryes." I guess the concept of fighting for what (or who) you really want, reels me in. Plus, these shows are hilariously dramatic, I can't help but watch. Sorry Darlene, I guess I am a FOB..but it's okay, I was born in the Philippines anyway =P I know this probably isn't grade A acting (or material,) but hey, I'll keep watching just as long as the cute guys are on!

"Only You"

P.S. I've been watching way too much tv....someone shoot me :(

Done

With summer school! Crossing my fingers all goes well, but at the end of the day, I know that whatever grade I get is my hardest earned grade yet. Too bad I didn't study this hard during my first two year of college...lol, then I'd me making those A's!

But with my class finally being completed, I finally can take a breather. Well, after I finish my first shift on Labor & Deliver, which I'm pretty nervous about. Other than that, I have some things I definitely want to accomplish:

_ Actually exercise...school isn't an excuse anymore!
_ Read a novel a week
_ Bake a cake from scratch
_ Road trip!
_ Learn how to sew
_ Hang out with Julie before she leaves to Italy
_ Get dressed up and go out for a night
_ Get a hair cut
_ Re learn the violin
_ Move into my new place
_ Take the calc placement test (again) since it's expired -_-
_ Clean my car & room
_ Relax...and enjoy summer


It's doable, right? :)

All you gotta do is kick, push

Saturday Night Fever

I'm beginning to dislike Saturdays. The past few Saturdays, I have been either sick or studying. I can't wait for August to come!!

While everyone around me is occupied with a certain someone, I'm still my single self. Oddly enough, I really don't care nor do I want to try. Maybe I'm just realizing that relationships naturally take its course? Or is it that I've become so career minded to even take a second to think about someone else? I guess what I equate a relationship to is more excitement, something I'm definitely lacking.

-----
Fun stuff:

Bold the statements you agree with. I miss somebody right now.
I don’t watch TV these days. - I caught up on 5 hours of television yesterday and 2 today..new record for the year!!
I wear glasses or contact lenses.
I love to play video games.
I’ve tried marijuana.
I have been in a threesome.
I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship. I wasn't psycho, just the least rational.
I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
I’m TOTALLY smart.
I’ve broken someone’s bones.
I’m paranoid sometimes.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free. Who wouldn't?
I need money right now. Uhm...big NEED
I LOVE sushi.
I talk really, really fast.
I have long hair.
I have lost money in Las Vegas.
I have at least one sibling. try four
I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
I couldn’t survive without Caller ID. I like the way I look. most of the time
I am usually pessimistic.
I have a lot of mood swings.
I’m always hyper no matter how much sugar i have.
I have a lot of friends. Quality>Quantity in the long run
I am currently single.
I have pecked someone of the same sex.
I enjoy talking on the phone. This happens on rare occassions
I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants. I'm the opposite, I love getting dressed up
I love to shop.
Enjoy window shopping.
I would rather shop than eat. Tough one...
I don’t hate anyone.
I’m a pretty good dancer.
I’m completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
I have a cell phone.
I believe in God.
I watch MTV on a daily basis.
I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
I’ve rejected someone before.
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
I want to have children in the future.
I have changed a diaper before.
I’ve called the cops on a friend before.
I’m not allergic to anything.
I have a lot to learn.
I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
I am shy around the opposite sex.
I have tried alcohol before.
I have made a move on a friend’s significant other or crush in the past.
I own the “South Park” movie.
I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.Papa John's baby!
I have used my sexuality to advance my career
. I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it.
I am happy at this moment. I’m obsessed with guys.
I study for tests most of the time.
I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I’ve ever met.
I am comfortable with who I am right now. Could be more, though
I have more than just my ears pierced.
I walk barefoot wherever i can.
I have jumped off a bridge.
I love sea turtles.
I spend ridiculous money on makeup.
I Plan on achieving a major goal/dream. I
’m proficient in a musical instrument. Used to be...in violin
I worked at McDonald’s restaurant.
I hate office jobs.
I love sci-fi movies.
I think water rules.
I want to go to college out of state.
I like sausages. I love kisses.
I love hugs.
I usually like covers better than originals.
I can pick up things with my toes.
I can’t whistle.
I can move my tongue in waves, much like a snakes slither.
I have ridden a horse.
I still have every journal I’ve ever written in. Hopefully, no one has read ANY of them I talk in my sleep.
I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
Climbing trees is a brilliant past-time.
I have jazz in my blood.
I wear a toe ring. I have a tattoo.
I can’t stand at LEAST one person that I work with.
I am a caffeine junkie. Coffee :(
I cosplay or know what cosplaying is.
I have been to over 15 conventions.
I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical the better.
I’m an artist.
I only clean my room when necessary.
I like a person of the same sex.
I love being happy. Wow, who would say no to the best feeling in the world..
I am an adrenaline junkie. --I'm still scared of rollercoasters... =X But I'll go on one, closing my eyes

Comfort

Can I have both, please? :)

The Little Engine That Could

It's interesting to note how we learn some of life's most valuable lessons when we're young. I remember reading this book as clueless little kid just like it was yesterday. It was one the most memorable books of my childhood! I know I most likely understood the illustrations more than the moral of the story, but I'll forever remember the saying "I think I can, I think I can.." now what does this teach exactly? Looking back, it definitely reveals

- optimism: something that, although it may seem I generally allude, I definitely need more. Also known as self efficacy, if we think we are able to reach our goals, we will make it happen.
- hard work: nothing worth having comes easy in life, everyday is a struggle. But these self earned moments in life is what makes life worth living.

As I take my summer anatomy class, which is about halfway done and exponentially getting harder (for instance, I have to learn all the muscles and the nervous system by WEDNESDAY!!!) I'm definitely trying to concentrate on moving forward. Although I did well on my first test, I didn't do so well on the second because I really psyched myself out. The way you think really can get the best of you.

So as I end this post, I leave with one piece of advice in mind:

Make it happen.

Cute story of the day =)

How to Install LOVE
Tech Support: Hello … how can I help you?
Customer: Well, after much consideration, I’ve decided to install
Love. Can you guide me through the process?
Tech Support: Yes. I can help you. Are you ready to proceed?

Customer: Well, I’m not very technical, but I think I’m ready. What do I do first?

Tech Support: The first step is to open your Heart. Have you
located your Heart?

Customer: Yes, but there are several other programs running now.
Is it okay to install Love while they are running?

Tech Support: What programs are running ?

Customer: Let’s see, I have Past Hurt, Low Self-Esteem, Grudge
and Resentment running right now.

Tech Support: No problem, Love will gradually erase Past Hurt
from your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent
memory but it will no longer disrupt other programs. Love will
eventually override Low Self-Esteem with a module of its own called High
Self-Esteem. However, you have to completely turn off Grudge and
Resentment. Those programs prevent Love from being properly installed.
Can you turn those off ?

Customer: I don’t know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

Tech Support: With pleasure. Go to your start menu and invoke
Forgiveness. Do this as many times as necessary until Grudge and
Resentment have been completely erased.

Customer: Okay, done! Love has started installing itself. Is that
normal?

Tech Support: Yes, but remember that you have only the base
program. You need to begin connecting to other Hearts in order to get
the upgrades.

Customer: Oops! I have an error message already. It says, “Error
- Program not run on external components.” What should I do?

Tech Support: Don’t worry. It means that the Love program is set
up to run on Internal Hearts, but has not yet been run on your Heart. In
non-technical terms, it simply means you have to Love yourself before
you can Love others.

Customer: So, what should I do?

Tech Support: Pull down Self-Acceptance; then click on the
following files: Forgive-Self; Realize Your Worth; and Acknowledge your
Limitations.

Customer: Okay, done.
Tech Support: Now, copy them to the “My Heart” directory. The
system will overwrite any conflicting files and begin patching faulty
programming. Also, you need to delete Verbose Self-Criticism from all
directories and empty your Recycle Bin to make sure it is completely
gone and never comes back.

Customer: Got it. Hey! My heart is filling up with new files.
Smile is playing on my monitor and Peace and Contentment are copying
themselves all over My Heart. Is this normal?

Tech Support: Sometimes. For others it takes awhile, but
eventually everything gets it at the proper time. So Love is installed
and running. One more thing before we hang up. Love is Freeware. Be sure
to give it and its various modules to everyone you meet. They will in
turn share it with others and return some cool modules back to you.

Customer: Thank you, God.

"Believe that you have it, and you have it." —Latin Proverb

Work

Hard work DOES pay off =)

Ego - Beyonce featuring Kanye West

No fear

Getting it Together

Where did everyone go? Sometimes I feel the world is spinning, while I'm at a standstill. As summer is here, I'm finding it even harder to stay in and study as opposed to going out. I guess I'm saying this because so far, this has been the loneliest summer yet.

I guess you have to be careful what you ask for sometimes.

Note to self:

-work hard, play later > work hard, party harder (hasn't been working for me thus far...hah)

Music

The Way You Make Me Feel - Michael Jackson

My favorite Michael Jackson hit. I swear, if I could be a video girl to ANY song, it would be this one. Why? Well, it really does put me in a good mood :)

Anatomy

By far, one of the most enriching classes I've taken so far.

& it's only been the 2nd day.



And to think, this time, 6 weeks from now, I'll know my own body inside and out. It really makes me realize: if we really took the time to stop, think, we would really answer a lot of our own questions.

Hmph.

This sounds oh too familiar. =/
Do you guys think this is true?

You can't express every feeling that you have every moment that you have them.

-When Harry Met Sally




I'm suddenly beginning miss this feeling.

I'm still alive!

First of all...Happy cumpleanos to my dear amiga, Elainne. She turned 20 today!

Going to make this entry short, cause I'm pretty busy with:

moving out
my LAST final (yeahhh public health)
HOAG, new gyn/uro DC :]
and just being me.


But I'll leave with my story of the day.
So Darlene and I went to Marie Calendars for dinner. Delicious meal btw. Anyway, we had this really cute waiter who had the warmest smile! So as we were leaving, I left him a note on my receipt saying "Thanks gorgeous." Heh. It sure made me giggle.

Okay, that's all!

HmMm..

As the school year is coming to an end, I start to feel the anxious, yet exciting, feeling churning inside my stomach. Time really does fly; I'm pretty much halfway through college. Who knew I'd be here...4 years ago? Let alone, a year? I'm a firm believer that my decisions have made me who I am today, no matter how much I [may have] regretted them in the past. I went from some apathetic teen who applied to CAMS [my high school] on a whim, surprisingly got in, and somehow landed at UCI. Looking back, I've been making big decisions early on.

Why is it that now, at 19 years old, I've having trouble making decisions? I know life doesn't get any easlier, but as the days go on, I feel as if I'm digging myself into a whole of uncertainty. It scares me how fast time passes, and how responsibilities like fending for myself financially pop up. It's like, when did I grow up? Likewise, for the first time that I can remember, I'm not sure what I want anymore. I'm sorting this internal battle of deciding if my motives are based on what I really want, as opposed to what I feel is "right."

Frankly, I'm a little uneasy about what lies ahead.

Who's with me on this one?

First Blog

Pretty informal first entry...but..hullo! I have succumbed to the world of blogspot. I've had my xanga for about 8 years, but I now feel as if it's more of a place for me to add tidbits motivational quotes as opposed to actually writing about how I feel. So now, tada, here I am.

But for now...I leave you all with this video. Oldie but goodie.



Fantasy - Mariah Carey